I’m trying to soften the edges around my “self” which has been hardened by a combination of intellect and painful experiences. I was young, ambitious, assertive, staunchly independent, hard-working, critical (though not judgmental), proactive, always reading between the lines and looking for loopholes…these were the traits that defined me and gave me an “invincible spirit” and as a result made me less connected with God.
I want to repair that relationship with the Supreme, higher being. After all, how can one watch the sun rise and set without acknowledging that it surpasses all things man-made? Surely the sun is something to be grateful to God for.
I’m starting by embracing and learning to love what I used to avoid: making small talk with my mom even if we are complete opposites; trying to be more compassionate towards less educated drivers and pedestrians; and—surprise, surprise!—dropping back to my heart’s delight during practice (with help of course from my teachers Edith and Becky whom I simply L-O-V-E).
Just a note on backbends. From Gregor Maehle’s book:
“In our experience, individuals with an open backbend find it easy to accept others without judgment, and there is at least anecdotal evidence that progress in backbending is related to acquiring a more open and sympathetic character. Since it improves our feminine qualities, backbending seems to help us to see value in the opinions of others even if these are contrary to our own. As backbending softens what can be called the “armor” or “cage of the heart—that is, the rib cage—it makes us compassionate and helps us to open our hearts to those disadvantaged or in need.
However not everyone who has an open backbend is a genuine, loving human being, and not every stiff back bender is a selfish, hung-up miser. One’s backbending seems to improve if one imagines the qualities and attributes associated with backbends while performing them.”
Lead with the heart, follow with the head. Om.
image from http://www.tevenei.com/
